As much as he has complained and been thoroughly exhausted I really believe that Michael has been deriving deep deep satisfaction from this concrete side job he has been doing (okay he even took pictures). The money definitely has made a difference to him but it is a great deal more than that. The down side has been that I haven't seen him a whole lot and that he truly is wiped out when he gets home. He now has a tan that is darker than my skin and might soon actually pass as a native. Today at church he got an offer for another side job, building a house, that he is considering. The biggest conflict he is having is that this is so out of HIS realm of belief about what a job is or the "proper" way to earn money. The good ole' USAF strikes again. Thinking out of the box is not something that I believe my husband comes by easily. Poor guy, thrust into our little bubble here and pop goes the rest of what he knew about how life works.

As I have been meditating and praying about what I have been feeling both physically and emotionally, I came across a solution which of course has been staring me in the face for the last year. My iron levels are way way to low again. Not that I ever got them up to an acceptable level in the first place. The fatigue, headaches, anxiety, bruising etc..... are all back to the classic symptoms that I had last summer. Somehow I think that my body should just work. That it should just automatically bounce back. That I can put it through whatever and it should just know what to do. I guess this is the first revelation that as one's body gets older it just doesn't bounce as well.
I am still so struggling with sadness over wanting everything to have been so perfect with Thayne's birth. We had an ambulance fly past us the other night after we went out for dinner and I was immediately flashing back to our ride last year and why don't they get better shocks on those stupid trucks?! It must go so much deeper because I work and process and there is this deep sorrow that doesn't go away. I am not sure how to touch it and journey through it.

Everyday Lydia keeps asking,"Are my teeth coming in?" I assure her they are but we can't see anything there yet. We picked up a book on Venice so Chaiya can start dreaming and creating her vacation there. She will probably have the map and every cool place memorized before she goes. Hostels are about 37 to 45 Euros which are really reasonable. Quayde had a great time camping. Apparently boy will be boys and they had some fun with making shaving cream faces on each other while sleeping.
On to a new week of work and play and discovery. Maybe sleep.